teaching life

AS of now only thing that  is scaring me, my out of patience behaviour.

There are many things we need to keep a check in our behaviour towards kids as well as others around us. The main chapter of parenting is that, we cannot teach our kids to be like someone ,which we ourself cannot depict to them.

We always end up showing them the most vulnerable part of ours. Its easy for our kids to learn from what we show other than, through our long lectures , to them . We are letting them learn , about being the real human, but at times we want them to be the entire opposite to how we react . 

I show them my angry side, loving side, playful side, powerful style and many more. which comes out of me uncontrollably. I am showing them , thats life. Sometimes when am dealing with some impossible persons , whom I seriously don’t want to talk ever , or being a part of anything, which am not at all interested , I am show them , am just happy, and not my uncomfortable part. 

Being human is very difficult, we have to deal with many people and things ,and sometimes, we are forced to be what we are not, just to be accepted and considered. I do not want to be like that, but , when we count on others happiness , we just do it. Sometimes these sacrifices are always worthy and teach us many lessons. 

Life is a test , for which we do not have any preparations, and people whom we are dealing with are questions, which by reading  innumerable times also , we cannot understand. 

Hope my kids learn in quite well ,from this vulnerable mom. 

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bribing my kids

As all parents , even i fall into bribing my kids at times, even though i know its bad.

Now am  trying not to do it, since i know  am doing bad to them. I buy them many things even if they don’t ask me , i like surprises. But now i have to get rid of it , because am spoiling them.

Few years back i had  a conversation with one of my friends , whose words keeps rumbling in my ears , always . She had told me about kids , who go into big schools ( i mean, where more money is rolled in) , they keep demanding their parents they want european tours or hifi parties and all ,like their rich friends. And poor parents are blamed for not meeting their demands. 

Am scared of such instances , coming up in my life. I don’t want to spoil my kids. I want them to learn to appreciate ,what they already have and things they can achieve with their handwork ,and not fall into such horrible demands.  I just can’t tell them that I may not be accepting such behaviour , so instead, am making them realise the importance of being happy with what you have .

Bribing is the stepping stone to all bigger demands, kids take it as an advantage.Sometimes accepting things which are feasible for us is good , sometimes its not acceptable. There are many parents who struggle all life to keep their kids happy  , they sacrifice everything for their kids. Ofcourse we love our kids, but love should be given in the form of our time , and attention,rather than gifts .

The time we give them, will always be the time they would give us back. So now on if I have to bribe my kids ,I would give them my time, instead of gadgets and favourite gifts. 

please grant me more patience

The pain in my head increases, the hormones are running up and down and here n there, seems like the world is upside  down, and gravity is running away ,and am rotating with the earth , tears and words running out of me, blood is rushing in me, everything is going against my wishes , and suddenly, all goes normal, seems i was in some roller coaster ride for few seconds. 

This happens when am all tried after all the work and finally out of a relaxed bath, and I see a big mess in the place , where I had just cleaned and left . 

I don’t know whom to blame and I tend to blame everyone , finally cleaning it up all on my own , and giving up shouting at everyone. I hate rework ,a and for past few years, thats what am doing every now and then . This year with my lil naughty one around,  its like double work for me , my elder one and their dad. 

Nothing is set right, the house is always upside down , nothing is in its proper place, nothing is beautiful , nothing is perfect. From morning till night , My bones are always in a up and down motion , as I have to keep picking things , and keep it safe up , else , keep picking up my daughter , as she keeps falling or doing some mischief. 

But in the end, when she is off to sleep, I look at her lovely innocent face, and feel relaxed, atleast she is happy . The way she holds on to me, and looks into my eyes and says her silent whisper ,that she loves me, all my tiredness vanishes into thin air , and leave me in the guilt of being angry and at times too bad to them. 

I wish that suit too vanish into thin air as my tiredness. 😉

morning blues

Vacation over, my marathon starts.

These ten days was quite relaxing, along with my kids, i too became too lazy , with my household. So yesterday night , shining about the coming week , I was damn tired to even think about it. The thought of me running around waking up everyone ,making all my breakfast n lunch and packing up all to school and office , it was all like a a movie am watching with the fast forward button on.

May be because of that , I woke  up quite early and that too at 5 in the morning , and then as usual , reading my friends blog that too early morning in my mobile. ( I guess am mad ) . I was reading  her blog ,she has 4 kids so , she will be more tiring than me ,her blog inspired me, atleast I just have to deal with two kids and their dad. 😉 Feeling better.

As I was about to get out of the bed, my lil one woke up , and then i walked around with her , once she was  relaxed i put her to bed , then even though the bed inspired me to sleep then , but I struggled a lot and got out and escaped out into the kitchen , Because I realised, in the end only I have to do all the work, and not my lazy bed.

I got into my daily households, switched off all my rest of the alarms, who help me to wake up in a tough morning , then once I was half done, I started waking up m lil girl, who is more upset , than me, to go to school. I tried to stay calm, and not to get irritated with her, as I remember even I was the same when I was a kid, ( even now) .

SO at last I escaped from the trap of morning blues , and I wish everyday, I win in such a way , its a tough war. 😉

 

Little hands with mehandi

AS a kid too I was so fond of mehendi . I remember when I was a kid , I used to put mehendi whole night in my hand , and holding my hands stretched as if am jesus christ held on to the cross , while sleeping . Foolish of me to think that , the more i keep it in my hand, the darker the mehendi would be. 

It was tough for me to sleep , whole night, as I would feel cold , but I don’t want the mehendi to be a disaster , so I take pain in, and sleep as such. When I put mehendi , my dad and mom has double work, I keep telling mom, here scratching there scratching, and I need help in putting the blankets on me, scratch the nose, etc etc…I used to get scolding at times too. Still my mom used to put it for me, as I always loved it.

I was reluctant to put mehendi myself , I thought I never knew to do it, or never actually tried it on my own. Now when my kids ask, I always tel, don’t worry when we are off to vacation at your grandmas place , she will put it. Every time I used to give this excuse , and escaped. Finally she started to think that only their grandma knows it the best.Now she don’t even ask me, she knows her mom is not gona do it for her.

This vacation, I was stuck, no escape, and I knew how much she adored putting mehendi , finally I thought to give it a try, and I did it. I could see the proud smile on her face , she was proud that I put it for her, although not a big deal design, just a simple one , but she was happy. Thats more important for me. 

Again, I tried my hands on the second attempt to make her happy , though my imagination won’t work well, seems its rusted, I sought the help of internet , and luckily got some designs which could save my image in front of her. And am perfectly happy in doing it now. 

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